The Drunk and the Lazy
by B.L. Thomas
Summary: My OC winds up in a parallel dimension where she finds out where her cousin Kagaome has been running off to; but first, she runs into demons- some good and some bad. Particularly, a full dog-demon named Madara. Humor with romance and a little bit of an adventure. Co-authored with XxNachoxX.
1. Lilly Limestone

The Drunk and The Lazy

Chapter One: Lilly Limestone

Drunk. I have never been so completely, and utterly, drunk/intoxicated/wasted! And it was awesome!

Well, at least I thought it was…until I realized it was all true…

Hi. My name is Lilly Limestone. I came to Tokyo, Japan to live with the only family I have left: the Higurashis. They are Grandpa, Auntie, Kagome, Sota, and don't forget Buyo! Anyway, like I said, they are all that's left for me now in this modern time…so I decided to pass my time with alcohol or more specifically: sake.

Yeah, I'm not much of a bother−I come home drunk every morning from some pub or other, then sleep the day away and start all over. Fake IDs are very handy. And so is looking like 21 when you're actually 18. No difference really.

Being drunk seemed easy and fun (even though it was shortening my life span…like I cared), until one night, one night that reshaped my history (and not to mention increased my alcohol uptake ten-fold) forever and ever…

This is my twisted story…

Of course, it all started with me coming back to the Higurashi Shrine drunk. I swaggered up the never ending stairs, and apparently, took a wrong turn. Instead of sliding open the door into my room and then falling onto my bed…I opened the door to some well or other and fell headfirst into that said well.

I kept falling, wondering when I was going to face-plant into my pillows. Man, I've never been this drunk. It seemed as though I was never going to hit my bed as air rushed around me and never stopped. It was all psychedelic really: so many colors. I think someone might have put something in my drink.

Finally, the falling stopped. My bed felt weird…

Then, I heard birds chirping above my head. Must be morning now. Yes, another glorious hangover: I don't remember falling asleep.

"Dafuq? Stone walls? Where in the hell am I?" _Obviously not my room_…

With much difficulty, I staggered out of whatever I was via some…vines?

"When did we grow more trees?"

Being drunk had its perks, especially me being drunk. And when I get drunk (or, when I get _really_ drunk) I tend to imagine some pretty crazy shit.

As I climbed all the way out of the…well, apparently I was in a well…that's located in some forest? Anyway, I stumbled into said forest. I eventually made my way into a grassy field, with my sake in hand. I took a swig.

Suddenly, like a fucking, floating eel floated towards me? I may consider going sober after this, or drink myself to death.

"Dinner!" It cried.

"What the hell? Did you just talk!?" It stopped right in front of my face.

"Uh…yeah?" It obviously was confused.

"Huh." I took another drink.

"You smell funny, mortal." It sniffed me and then gagged a bit.

"Hey! I schmell…great!" Then, BAM! I passed out….with a bang.

"Hmm, probably will give me indigestion…" and if I was still awake, I would say it floated away.


	2. Madara

The Drunk and the Lazy

Chapter Two: Madara

Lazy. I choose _that_ word to describe myself. I could probably think of other words to portray a better picture of myself: but that's just it−I'm too lazy to do even that.

But, for the story's sake, I guess I should further introduce myself: the name is Madara…yeah, you don't get a last name…as you'll find out with most of this era. I am a pureblooded dog-demon. And for the moment, that's all you're going to get. Perhaps time will reveal more what I look like.

Today actually was a productive day for me: I was just lounging in a tree, snacking on these snacks the "time jumping girl" gave me. I was minding my own business (as I always do) when this girl came stumbling out of absolutely nowhere. I could smell that she was a mortal but something was wrong with her− I got the familiar whiff of some strong sake but other than that, there was something off. Something I've never smelled before. Well actually she kind of smelled like what's-her-face.

Seeing as though I ran out of snacks, I decided to check this shit out. I stopped dead in my tracks as I saw some low life demon approach her: this could be _very_ entertaining. It kind of was but, some butterfly or other distracted me. It soon flew away so I turned my gaze back to the freak only to find the girl passed out.

I picked up a stick as I approached _it_.

"Oi. You dead?" I said as I poked its back with the stick. It didn't move but I heard a slight groan. I crouched down beside her and pushed her onto her back (with the stick of course, I don't know _where_ this _thing_ has been).

"Hit me, sir!" she murmured…(as if she were at a bar?).

"Well, okay," I said as I punched her in the shoulder lightly. She moaned and fell back to sleep. Do I eat her? Is this edible? Nah, too easy. Wait, do I even eat humans? No, too gamey. What to do with her… Well, I got nothing better to do. So I grabbed her by the scruff of her shirt and stalked off…


	3. Madara's Grove

The Drunk and the Lazy

Chapter Three: Madara's Grove

I slowly regained my consciousness of the world around me as the delightful sound of birds chirping brought me to my senses since they made me more furious by the second. My head was pounding, causing my temples to pulsate. It took a while for my eyes to adjust, and when they finally did, I realized I was most definitely not in my room. In fact, the room was not familiar in the slightest. This scared me a bit−did I go home with someone I wasn't supposed to? The room was plain, with one window that was covered by a ratty, old screen as the door, or at least what I thought was supposed to be a door.

I stretched and just then realized I still had my clothes on: Phew! What a relief! I was just about to stand up when I felt a sharp pain in my shoulder. I removed my leather jacket to touch that place on my shoulder where it hurt−there was nothing! Not a scratch, not a bruise, not a bump! Maybe an inner bruise, perhaps? I then made my second attempt to get up; it seemed as the room was spinning in all directions and I could barely focus in on anything. All thanks to my glorious hangover.

I went to the screen door and removed the screen flap.

"Oh God!" I was enthralled by a blinding light which increased my headache immensely. I squinted my eyes to shield against the damnable light as I took a step into this outside.

I was then surrounded by a grassy field with bunches of wild flowers: a meadow, I guess one would call it. It was kind of beautiful, I begrudgingly admitted. And it was also completely uncalled for.

I started to walk through said meadow and ended up on a hill. The flowers I was walking through changed into a bed of lilac. The wind blew and the petals began to fly all around. Suddenly, I spotted a bright, purple figure lying in the bed of lilacs. I decided to approach it. I got closer to it to find _it_ was a woman there, the appeared to blend in with the flowers: her hair, to be more exact. She was looking up at the clouds, not paying any mind to me at all.

"Hello." I said. She slowly turned to me.

"So, you're up?"

"Umm, yeah. How long have I been asleep? I never wake up this early."

"Hmmm, a day, I guess," she said as she sat up.

"Oh, okay, then where am I?"

"Madara's Grove," she said with apparent disinterest.

"And who are you?"

"Madara."

"Huh, well why did you bring me here?"

"Good question: I'll let you know when I figure it out myself." She was odd-looking, this Madara. I can say truthfully that I've never, ever seen anyone like her: she had long, lilac hair that was kept up in a pony-tail; she also had golden-brown eyes that seemed to be another world; weird, green markings were aligned on either side of her cheeks. All in all, she seemed _not_ _human_.

"What are you exactly?" I bluntly remarked.

"A dog demon."

"Sorry I asked," I mumbled.

"Forgiven," she sighed.

"I must be dreaming: there's no other explanation," I said mostly to myself.

"Or you're crazy."

"Yeah, that's probably it," I agreed as I continued to gaze around. "Well, since I'm here, might as well enjoy myself. Gee, I would rather like some alcohol," I muttered along with myself.

"Then go buy some," Madara stated as she took a long, wooden pipe out of nowhere. She began to smoke as she went back to gazing at the sky.

"My name is Lilly, by the way."

"Who cares?"

"Apparently you don't. You shouldn't smoke that stuff, by the way; you'll get cancer."

"I'll get _what_?"

"Never mind." I plopped myself next to her, trying to let all this sink in. I started to cough as the smoke wafted into my nostrils. This all seemed _too_ realistic. I watched Madara puffing out smoke rings; it was amusing, but only for a while.

Then, I felt a sudden and anxious feeling coarse through my being.

I looked around and instantly saw a dark figure approaching.

"Madara…"

"Shut up and talk only when spoken to," she whispered to me.

Thus began the long and wild journey in the apparent feudal era that started with me doing whatever the fuck Madara commanded…

Although she wasn't glancing in said figure's direction, she was apparently aware of its presence. I tensed up.

I continued watching this figure and soon realized it was a man: a very pale looking man with long, somewhat wavy hair and…red eyes? He wore very bizarre-looking clothes, like medieval shit. He finally stood erect before us but looked directly at Madara.

"Afternoon, Madara. And what have we here?" He finally cast his glance upon me. It was just then that I saw a faint, glimmering light emitting from his pocket.

He watched my eyes with his cold red ones and smirked faintly…


End file.
